Contentment

Your Word, O Lord, is a Lamp unto my feet and a Light for my path. - Psalm 119:105
God has made everything beautiful in its time - Eccelsiastes 3:11 They are new every morning, great is your faithfulness - Lamentations 3:23I will bless the person who puts his trust in Me. It will be like a tree growing near the stream..it will not be afraid..it has no worries..it keeps on bearing fruit - Jeremiah 17:7-8
I'll be your candle on the water...

Monday. The weather was pose-perfect that day. I'd just handed in my assignment and thought that i needed some time away from it all. So at 3pm, i took a walk to the Gardens. With my Cardiovasular module in my bag (So ambitious, konon), i took a leisurely walk to that place i call Peaceful. After taking a few pictures, i decided to settle down on a park bench (my favourite spot was overgrown with grass!!) and listen.

To hear the sound of birds calling to each other, the crackle of gravel as people walked past behind me, the sound of whispers as couples walked by hand-in-hand, ducks as they waddled towards anyone that carried some munchies. To see. To see nature in its glory, the sun as it hid shyly behind the folliage, to see children as they played and laughed to their hearts content at the swings. I wanted to stay there forever. Is that how heaven is going to be like? Around what makes my heart smile?

Ever had that feeling that though you are physically alone, the presence of God is so strong He is walking right beside you? So as you'd probably guess by now, Cardiovascular never made it :P. To bask in peace and take in the freshness of the air, the cool breeze as it blew through my hair. Time flew. The next thing i knew, it was already 6.30pm.

Growing your faith

Sunset from my bedroom window...

I'm glad i went for School of Leaders today. I'm even happier that i attended 10.45am service. We had a guest speaker today, Pastor Ropati Amosa. He has an amazing annointing from God. The flame that burns for Christ. To be convicted and renewed by faith in God's promises. It's all about You, Jesus.

Here are the 5 points he talked about as to how to grow your faith:
1. Know your rights as a child of God.
- God has given YOU the power to overcome all things!
2. Focus on your focus.
- Focus on your focus because it makes your focus clear. So often do i forget my focus and start looking for things that are good. But see, God wants what's the best, not just what's good.
3. Exercise your rights and authority.
- The authority given to you from Christ is of no use if you do not exercise it.
4. We need to look at the different seasons and times of life.
- There is a season and a time for everything. Ecclesiastes 3:11
- We need to see things from God's perspective, not ours!
5. Trust in the sovereignty of God.
- If all perspectives fail, trust that God knows and resign in that truth. Jeremiah 17:7
- You are an eagle. An eagle doesnt just fly, it soars to great heights!
- Surround yourself with positive people. Some people are so negative that if you put them in a dark room, they might just develop.

I have forgotten how tiring dancing can be. Can you believe it? We made 2 hours plus! And all that equals 30 seconds real time. Whoa... but it was cool fun! Everyone was just bobbing along, and making up moves in front of those huge gigantic mirrors. And Chewy just had to come up with that fairy tutu idea! I'm really grateful for the people that God has put around me. So often i forget what a blessing it is and instead try to find a certain happiness outside just the friends scope. But no, now i see, every moment i spend with these gorgeous people, i'm gonna make the most of it! Focus, Ange, focus!

Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. -Hebrews 11:1.

Home is where the heart is

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I'm excited!! After living in this flat, familiarising myself with practically every crook and nook of the place, i'm going to move! From 543 George Street.... Anzac Ave, HERE I COME!! We had our first future-flatmates meeting over dinner at Friendlys last Wednesday. Cool. Went through quite a bit, from the usual rent payments, sharing cooking (pray it all works out fine) up to drowning out crap sounds. Ugh. Finally decided that i'll take the room downstairs so i guess that would mean changing my going-to-shower habits too. No more streaking across with a towel. Hah! I've got a bigger room *smiling* and flatmates that care about hygiene! I'm really looking forwards to it. We've gonna make this flat a home. :) Woohoo.. Hmm...still got a tad of a problem with telephone lines and internet tho...

It's about...

~Learning to live harmoniously together.

~Learning to be honest with each other.

~Learning each other's quirky habits.

~Learning to confront another in love.

~Learning to give and take.

~Learning to appreciate each other.

~Learning to watch out for one another.

~Learning to spend quality time together.

~It's about learning to share life together.

Flatmates (Friends) are God's way of taking care of us.- Author Unknown -

"I run in the paths of your commands, for you have set my heart free." Psalm 119:32

Moi

My test has been postponed to Tuesday. Passed up 2 assignments just now. *Phew* Just one major assignment and one test to go. The freedom of seeing them 'slip' into the assignment box. Ah... "Freedom. Take it. It's yours!!!!". So i've decided to give myself a treat, other than the usual retail therapy, to fill in one of those what-you-do-to-destress questionaires. I got this one off C's, who got it off B's, who got if off A's, who got it off.....

Three names you go by
Angela
Ange
Amei

Three parts of your heritage
Hmm... Chinese
Malaysian
Melanau

Three things that scare you
Blood and gore
Walking alone at night
Heights and lots and lots of water

Three of your everyday essentials
God
Bathroom
Other essentials

Three things you are wearing right now
Common sense
sleepy eyes
basic necessities

Three of your favourite songs at this moment
I Thought She Knew - NSYNC
Happy Ending - Avril Lavigne
It's All ABout Jesus - Planet Shakers

Two truths and a lie
I wonder what kind of cells blackheads are made of.
I enjoy lying outside watching the stars.
I adore sunbathing on the beach, melanoma and all!

Three physical attributes about the opposite sex that appeal to you
His heart (??? Hmm..i dont mean that literally)
His smile and laughter.
His height.

Three of your favourite hobbies
Taking the scenic route.
Meeting up over coffee!
Cross-stitch

Three careers you are considering/dreaming about
Pharmacist (specialising in paeds)
Teacher
Owning a bakery/cafe

Three place you want to go on Vacation
Vanuatu.
Singapore.
Europe.

Three things you want to do before you die
Learn how to play the piano.
Complete a full marathon.
Reach one more for Christ.

Three ways you are stereotypically a boy
Do the homeboy handshake with my male Pharmacy dudes.
Not adopt a very good seating posture...legs, back, nope not going into details here.
Want to put my purse in a pocket but not have to worry that it bulges.

Three ways you are stereotypically a girl
I like my toilet seats DOWN.
I like pink and cute things (not that guys cant, of course!)
Shopping for girlie clothes (again...guys arent necessarily excluded :P)

Three female celeb crushes
Sandra Bullock
Kate Hudson
Gilian Anderson

Three male celeb crushes
Hugh Jackman
Colin Firth
Wang Lee Hom

Three people you would like to see take this quiz
An
Ny
One

"But He knows the way that i take, when He has tested me, I shall come forth as gold." Job 23:10

My eye on you

Isnt he simply adorable??

Ever have that feeling when you're sitting in a cafe or just waiting and looking out in a traffic jam, to feel that there's a pair or eyes, or even eye, on you? And there's no shaking it off? It can be a physical pair of eyes, sometimes spiritual. Ghosts? Hmm....but spirits? I'd say so. Good spirits and evil ones too. And it can be rather... umm...shall i say, disturbing. And there's always that wonder that those pair of eyes are thinking. People stare (for all different reasons :P). May not be the most comfortable if you are the stare-ee. I wonder what it is about humans that give us the ability to sense this. That we dont need to watch to feel that we are being watched. It is the spiritual side of us? Something wired in our brains? What is it? 7th sense?

Power of suggestion

The power of suggestion is a very powerful thing. It's often underestimated. MAJOR. I wonder why i've grown up all my life entertaining and being entertained by this invisible power and yet not realise the impact it had and has in my life. "In the wrong hands, it can become a very dangerous weapon." In younger days, it was something that was always 'fun'. No strings attached. People just teased and implied things that they thought would happen.

"Aiye...why he come look for you ah?"
"Did you know that she liked you since Form 1?"
"I think those two make a very good couple eh."

Little do we realise the gravity of what is suggested. Most of the time it ends up just a waste of time and brain activity...and if unfortunate, emotions get involved. The wrong kind. 99.9% of the time they are just rumours. Figments of imagination that have the potential to materialise. Ah, that's where the problems come in. Potential...

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An angel decided to pay me a visit last night. She came at an unexpected time. It was half-past twelve. Funny, she must have had the keys to my room cos i dont remember the door opening or the light being switched on. She came in and said "I need a hug." It doesnt take much to feel loved. Truly loved. How i wish i could wipe all her tears away. To put a smile on her face. To tell her that everything was going to be alright. What is a little sacrifice as long as people around you can smile and be at peace? It's worth it, isnt it? Some may call it self-righteous. Not if it's from the heart. Can human sacrifice be totally free from strings? No udang di sebalik batu? It it does, how can it be called sacrifice?

"....suffer nutritiously" -ben (15 Sept '05) Note the pun.

Thinking of that afternoon nap?

I learnt a new term today: postprandial somnolence. It's that moment when you've just had your lunch, about half an hour later, that thick, drowsy, intoxicated feeling. Like sleep is the solution, the only solution. Haha, even the afternoon nap that is so addictive has a posh name. Just *dum-de-doo* proud of myself for learning something new. :)

6 assignments in 2 weeks. That's speed assignments for this Endocrinology module. I've completed 1 today (argh..just one!) and am currently working on my second, though this fleeting concentration power isnt helping me one bit. We start Law tomorrow and for some strange reason, i'm more inclined to read my Law notes now than Thyroid ones. Jess, that's new news for you...

Feeling a little confused some times. Not sure why i feel that way though i know i shouldnt. It's annoying and i'm working hard to get over it. Yet some people say that the harder you try to get away from it, the more you allow it to get to you. Well, what am i supposed to do? It's not like it's something i want either. It's annoying. Using up brain energy and space. Man, sometimes the only way is to flee away for a while. I'm tired of fleeing away though. I just want things to be back to the way they were. Is this a test, Lord? :S

Three little foochow girls

Gonna miss you, Piggy!!!

We've given 'girl talk' another meaning. Three foochow girls sitting in the corner of Gloria's Cafe in Meridian. It's funny, some things that have just never been brought up again resurfaced. Of course there was also the unexpected 'news' and ''what? how come you never told me one?". Conversation started with the 'Homosexuality acceptable Biblically?' and 'where is the grey area' and transverstites (pondans), sex changes... Man, that's definitely one area that we can talk about in G12. Someone please remind me. It's not exactly an issue you'd openly talk about in a public cafe, and i guess that's where the foo-chaw came in handy. Gosh, i gotta expand my foochow vocab!

Then comes the girl girl talk. Was there a time when you had this battle in yourself about getting used to the new 'things'? And no one was up to the same speed either..making things a little (just a little) bit more complicated. It was like buying a wet suit and putting it on. Trouble with this wet suit is that you cant tailor the change when and how you want it, cant take it off, just have to accomodate it. Not very pleasant earlier on. Funny...now looking back.

Got the yellow shirt i've been eyeing at Glassons. :) Now to get a matching sunny skirt...

We've got our 5th flattie for 2006 too! I'm happy. God has provided...again! *all smiles*

"....horrendously bimbotic" - Josh O (10 Sept '05)

Hormones aint all fun...

Dont you just get so sick of those hormones some times? From the stoopid mood swings to the unpredicatable, over-emotional moments? Argh... it's moments like these that i wish i was a guy. :P I have to thank Mart and Chia for putting up with me. That sure aint easy... but they've done a marvellous job! :) Sorry, i know it's just a molehill, and i'm much better now. Look at me..i'm smiley girl! :D

Tired. Last day of externship. Mixed feelings. Happy that i wont be standing 8 hours straight every day (oh my goodness....what have i gotten myself into???) but sad that i wont be working with the people i've gotten used to, actually putting knowledge into practice in the dispensary, counselling patients, getting to know the people that come into the pharmacy. The friendships, the professional side of pharmacy. I have to admit, that even though i've had my moments, it was fun and very memorable. Learnt lots of things in 5 days. Yes, though i am still not used to working under S's stare (bleh), the people have taught me how to work as a team, function as a body and yes, i've got the check check check policy ingrained very well into my grey matter. Now the challenge is how to check systematically. I'm gonna miss you guys...

YOOHOOOO.....classes resume on Monday.....

Interesting..

void

wonder how it feels like to be void of all emotions. no happiness. no laughter. no sadness. no pain. void. sometimes i get tired of feeling. sleeping used to be a way of 'escape'. but now i cant even sleep at night. horrible. i'm sorry for making you upset. i didnt mean it. honest. :S try to dig a hole and bury it down deep inside me. yet i know. i know God is the only one who heals. surrender.

iraq makes me smile

Extern Day 1

Of all people, all places, all time, i just had to have S as my locum! Man... when i stepped into the pharmacy, all ready to brace what the day throws at me (as well as an attitude check in the morning..again), i had to be greeted by him! It had to be that pharmacy, that time. But honestly, it isnt as bad as it sounded. Just the initial shock i guess. taught me a thing or two about control drugs and made me feel more confident about my asthma and COPD drugs. :)Anyway, real challenge for me to keep my chin up, wear my positivity-suit, and learn as much as i can. Every time i get unmotivated, i remind myself of Colossians 3:23. God's Word is alive. I got to know M and T, nice people and let me do a few things on my own. My preceptor A is coming tomorrow. Looking foward to it.. Whole day been standing (idiot...why did you wear heels?? :S), tired, motivated to study by being reminded of how much i do not remember, tired, tired, tired....beginning to sound like a broken CD player. I better stop.

"Whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men." Colossians 3:23

Decisions

Just a thought..

I wonder how Mum and Dad decide on what to cook everyday. For me here, it's like "Hmm..what to cook for dinner?" and being an irresponsible-not-really-taking-care-of-self student, it's easy to resort to what's quick and easy. But noo.... *shaking head* Somehow parents back home find the time, idea and brain power to cook lunch AND dinner EVERY...SINGLE...DAY in spite of their already busy and hectic day, picking kids up and trying to rest during their short breaks. It can be so draining for me (oh no, why does this growing-old theme keep on coming back to me!!??), and day after day it's always that same decision making dilemma. *sigh* Is there a secret to cooking dinners? I used to have a Canadian friend who told me that her family had the same thing every day of the week, eg Mondays-pizzas, Tuesdays-burgers...etc, and Sundays were 'leftover' days. What?!? Keep leftover food for up to one week?? I was thinking of resorting to that, but nah...i'd get sick of it, i'm sure. Or..wait a minute..maybe i wont, just maybe.

i'll be missing you....

I'm going to miss you Mr Holiday! Why do you have to fly past so fast? This has been the bestest semester break ever since i've reached Dunedin soil. Dont get me started... *although everything's already mentioned in the previous blogs entries :D*

Daddy's booked tickets home on the 14th December. That means that i'll get at least 2 months back home! :) Funny, the older i get the less the thrill of going back. Sure, look foward heaps to seeing family and friends, but to a certain extent, it's like "Ok, going back." It doesnt seem to hold the whole ""wanna go shopping, eat lots of food, lepaking thing anymore. No idea why. Am i just getting old?!? Or is this normal? Pray i'll get my hospital externship done straight after the exams too. And even better...at Dunedin Hospital...

Youth ages, immaturity is outgrown, ignorance can be educated and drunkenness sobered, but stupidity lasts forever.

Is that true?

No life...without wife

Friendship is the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words. - George Eliot

And that was exactly what i had the honour of last night. Gina, B, Sulyn and i headed off to Martin's place after an afternoon of telling jokes (potato, potato, potato), watching video clips, listening to 90's music and jamming (Chia and B) at B's place. I knew they'd hit it off. They have so many similarities and their appreciation of all genres of music is rare to find.

A night that started out with Before Sunset (be-a-u-ti-ful movie!) and Bride and Prejudice (which of the only thing i've learnt is No life....*beat beat beat beat beat* without wife *beat beat beat beat beat*) plateau to (singing in Akon's style Lonely), hehe, a quiet night, dry of ideas, which only started to rekindle it's fire after 5am when the lights were switched off and 5 of us were lying like sardines in Mart's living room. Nice carpet... It was good, i cant think of a better word to describe it, talking, confiding and listening to each other. Learning a little bit more, and teasing a little bit more as well :P, of the person lying around you, and i just feel so thankful. Thankful to God to these amazing people that He has placed in my life. I wish i could freeze that moment in time. Comfortable, honest, genuine and reminding me of wonderful friendships so much more. I finally dozed off at 8am and when i awoke at 9.30am on a familiar feel of carpet, i looked around me, and i saw these people. 3 of whom were still on snooze mode. People whom i've shared my life with, my fears, my joys. And that's it. Contentment. I felt.... family. Love you people!!! :)

1st official day of spring!!

With pals at Green Island Memorial Park with our version of YMCA. (Sneak peak of spring!)

Courtesy of B: What's love...?

"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love."Rebecca- age 8

When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth."Billy - age 4

"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs."Chrissy -age 6

"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired."Terri - age 4

"Love is when my mommy makes coffee for mydaddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK."Danny - age 7

"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate."Nikka - age 6 (we need a few million more Nikka'son this planet)

"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday."Noelle - age 7

"Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken."Elaine-age 5

"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford."Chris - age 7

"Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day."Mary Ann - age 4

"You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget."Jessica - age 8